Healing The Masculine

This is a bit of a deep dive into my personal healing story today. Over the last couple of weeks I have been working a program to break through inner blocks, heal old wounds, and step more fully into my most authentic self and it has been one of the most powerful experiences of my life.

Image by McKinley Law

Image by McKinley Law

As I sat working through a section of the program we were invited to look at our masculine energy and explore how that energy feels to us. I immediately felt some resistance rise which is often an indicator that some work lies ahead.

To back track for a moment, many of you know that over the last two years I have held many women’s circles and moon circles that focused on bringing the Feminine to wholeness and into the light. I believed for a long time that I was doing just fine in my masculine energy and that it was my feminine nature that was deeply wounded. I never took the time to explore my masculine self - especially as the world has been captivated by feeling the feminine.

So back to this exercise of exploring what masculine energy felt like to me- well, it felt intimidating, hard, hustle, aggressive, untrustworthy.

Whoa. Turns out I am not OK in my masculine energy! My masculine is wounded and carries the energy of the Patriarchy- not the divine healed masculine that is supportive, protective, truthful, strong, and courageous.

I explored all the ways that masculinity has been shown to me in my life. The ways it has been fully embodied in its light aspects and the ways I have seen it working in its shadows. And I realized that in as many ways as my feminine nature was bruised so was my masculine because I cannot have one without the other and they play, intertwine, and inform the other in our psyches.

Where my feminine nature wishes to intuitively create and birth new ideas my masculine side needs to create safe places to be protected and the action for that to happen.

Where I long to be gentle and support others with compassionate emotional support I need strong boundaries and the courage to say ‘no’.

Logic helps to inform intuition.

Action makes way for being.

Survival makes way for healing.

Firmness allows for flexibility.

Penetration of consciousness is necessary to receive the wisdom.

What a revelation to connect with this healthy and authentic masculine energy! In just this coming to the light I have felt reclamation to these rejected parts of me- I refused the embrace of the masculine because I thought it was a brute. Turns out I AM my own best energetic lover- the ultimate provider to manifest the resources I need to feel nurtured.

I share this intimate piece of my journey with you because I have to wonder- how many of us womxn have rejected the sacred masculine aspect of ourselves and still, often unbeknownst to us, reject this aspect of ourselves?

So I am calling in my masculine energy each day- the protector, the truth teller, the adventurer, the courageous warrior- to hold space for my creative, sensitive, and intuitive wise woman. Asking to be guided to their miscommunications so they can be healed together, in Union, as they always wanted to be.