Letter From Janae: July
Hello Friend -
I have been really open and receptive to what feels good in life right now. How to find what feels good and then act on it. Sometimes it is that second part that is the toughest. One brilliant thing though that feels good and easily actionable is writing a monthly letter, right here, on the journal to share what is going on in my heart & life. (you can get more letters from me here)
I like to keep my weekly content useful and inspiring for living more simply, in alignment with natures rhythms through Ayurveda, and as practical tools for you to evolve into your highest self. But behind all that is an ever evolving being too! Sometimes I miss the old blogspot days where I would pour a lot of my heart out into my blog posts. But I have a bigger mission now and so I adapt. And it feels good. I hope you find these little monthly letters supportive and insightful from my heart to yours.
July for me was a month of surrender.
The last few weeks have challenged me to let go of what I was clinging to that wasn’t actually supportive of the life I want to live. It was a surrender to slowing down. To healing old wounds and facing fears- trusting it was for my highest good. It was surrendering to the unexpected twists and turns that retrogrades and eclipses can bring to our human experience. It was my ego surrendering to the highest self version of me that is demanding to be seen.
Surrendering is hard for me- I definitely have friends who do it more gracefully than I, but I am learning. Learning that I can’t control everything but I can certainly show up actively and in a way that reflects my best qualities and abilities. It often requires patience as well- another not-so-strong trait of mine, ha! Summer is such a powerful time for these lessons though, if we move to fast and force too much we get burnt out. The affects of our pushing, controlling, and over extending pop up faster and more apparently.
To stay healthy in mind and body we must embody the aspect of cool water. Water flows at the pace and direction it is destined for, not holding back, not forcing. It adapts to its obstacles and fills all the spaces it can in life, not afraid of being too much or being seen. I think water celebrates its relationship with us because we are so closely interrelated. I think its time to celebrate our water-y qualities more too!
Let me tell you a little story …
Despite all the opportunities to let go and cultivate patience it has been such a nourishing season. I have never felt so aligned, held by the Divine, and at ease in my life even when it isn’t necessarily easy. One of the ways I grew, healed, and upleveled this month was by visiting my General Practitioner for the first time in 6 years! You may have seen my insta-stories where I shared my fear & anxiety of going back to a western doctor and asking for their support. In 2013, I found Ayurveda and quit my doctor cold turkey after seeing her regularly 2 times a month for many months as I navigated chronic illness. I was really worn out by the western system of medicine and found amazing healing results with Ayurveda. But, as fate would have it I needed to have a blood draw done this month and I needed to ask her for support. The entire experience was an opportunity to be incredibly conscious and present through my relationship with my doctor and facing a historically debilitating fear of blood draws. I called in so many allies ahead of time- my Ayurvedic Practitioner, a Somatic Experiencing session to discharge latent emotions in by body and give me tools to use through the experience, and close friends who held me in their thoughts the day of my visit.
This may sound all like a bit much for a visit to the doc, but truly, after the experiences of my early and mid twenties I didn’t feel empowered in this area of human life. I have always encouraged others to use Ayurveda and western medicine together- for they both have positive roles, but I had not allowed myself this same permission. It was really important to heal this wound once and for all, you know?
So I did. My loves, I healed that damn wound SO good- ha! It was a powerfully healing experience where I spoke my truth, my needs, and collaborated with my doctor on my needs. I didn’t cry or have an anxiety attack when they took my blood, instead? I talked about Ayurveda with the nurse the whole time! This was one of the most powerful reprogramming experiences of my life to date-a rewriting of samskaras. And perfectly aligned with the retrogrades and eclipses that encourage us to reprogram and step up in our worthiness.
Did you have a potent experience this month? Something that made life pivot a bit or was a catalyst for deep change and healing?
Thank you for letting me share
It feels good to express those behind-the-scene moments that change us, and inevitable influence the work and healing that moves through this vessel to others.
I am honestly looking forward to what August has in store as I embark on some new teaching journeys and personal adventures. Of course, one day at a time and with graceful surrender.